Everybody's doing the Junior Bro Stomp
Week 9 results | ||||
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74-58 5-8 |
89-43 8-5 |
75-57 5-8 |
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Thursday, November 2, 2017 | ||||
Buffalo @ N.Y. Jets | Buffalo | Buffalo | New York Jets | |
Sunday, November 5, 2017 | ||||
Atlanta @ Carolina | Carolina | Atlanta | Atlanta | |
Indianapolis @ Houston | Houston | Houston | Houston | |
Cincinnati @ Jacksonville | Cincinnati | Jacksonville | Cincinnati | |
Tampa Bay @ New Orleans | New Orleans | New Orleans | Tampa Bay | |
L.A. Rams @ N.Y. Giants | L.A. Rams | L.A. Rams | New York Giants | |
Denver @ Philadelphia | Denver | Philadelphia | Denver | |
Baltimore @ Tennessee | Tennessee | Tennessee | Baltimore | |
Arizona @ San Francisco | San FranciSco | Arizona | Arizona | |
Washington @ Seattle | Seattle | Seattle | Seattle | |
Kansas City @ Dallas | Kansas City | Dallas | Dallas | |
Oakland @ Miami | Miami | Miami | Oakland | |
Monday, November 6, 2017 | ||||
Detroit @ Green Bay | Detroit | Detroit | Detroit | |
Byes: Chicago, Cleveland, Minnesota, New England, Pittsburgh, L.A. Chargers | ||||
© 2017 Gehlke Bros. Football |
Two, three, two, three, two, three… It may not be much of a dance move, but it’s the only one you need to know when you’ve got the smooth moves of the Junior Bro as he shuffles and glides his way through the 2017 Gehlke Bros. Football season with the Surfy in sight. You’ve seen it before. It’s one of those nostalgia routines that comes back around every few years and seems to be all the rage this season. It’s called the Junior Bro Stomp, and here’s how you do it:
It starts with picking up two games in even-numbered weeks, alternating with three games in the odd-numbered ones. This being Week 9, an odd number… you can do the math. Two, three, two, three… Then you do the SPLITS! The more you do them, the better. Five’s a nice number for this week. Pick a powerhouse home team like Philadelphia to plow through a feeble visitor like Denver, 51-23. Avoid a feeble home team like winless San Francisco to lose to a better division opponent, like Arizona, 20-10. Then you add some razzle dazzle, getting ahead of a trend by taking Jacksonville to topple Cincinnati from a 3-game winning streak, 23-7.
The Junior Bro Stomp is a NawFuL hit no matter where you go. They were even doing it in Texas on Sunday, where the Cowboys stomp, stomp, stomped the Chiefs to the tune of 28-17. The Falcons tried to do it in Carolina, but despite an early 10-0 lead, they kept reverting to a “Dirty Bird” routine that ultimately led to Glenn’s lone split victory of the weekend — a 20-17 Panthers triumph.
The Senior Bro has his own dance number this season, but only he appears to know the moves; it’s called The Backpedal. It’s starts with being tied for the lead and then sliding down the standings in six successive weeks until you’re 15 games back at midseason. Two, three, two, three… hey, these steps are the same as the Junior Bro Stomp! (Shhh, don’t tell anyone or they may steal our moves!)
Sean stomped his way to an 8-5 record in Week 9, while Glenn and Ben backpedaled together in second place with identical 5-8 marks. The only team we all picked correctly was Detroit. Indianapolis and Washington both marched to their own beat.